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Love Rehab: How to get over a breakup the healthy way

(Photo: Gurl.com)

(Photo: Gurl.com)

 

Slashed tires. Uncontrolled Facebook stalking. Quickly emptied bottles of vodka. These are just a few of the common post-breakup horror stories Jo Piazza gathered from women around the country for her new book, Love Rehaband she saw herself in almost all of them.

“Through my horrible breakups in my 20s, I did exactly what I don’t think women should do,” she says. “I ate and drank too much and just felt fat and hungover.”

While Love Rehab is a novel, Piazza, a journalist, soon realized how much her story of fictional women learning to deal with breakups in healthier, more productive ways resounded with women, and she decided to turn the plot, which centers around a group of women creating an AA-style plan for getting over addictions to failed relationships, into an actual 12-step recovery program. Goodbye unlimited Ben & Jerry’s and unwashed hair, hello healthy path forward.

“The whole program is designed so that you can get over your breakup and your mind and body can be in a great place,” Piazza explains,”and you really can’t do that unless those things are connected.”

We asked Piazza for three simple tips to help you stay healthy instead of heading towards a meltdown next time it just doesn’t work out. Hopefully, you won’t ever need them.

Love Rehab1. Admit you’ve been doing it all wrong and vow to make a change. There’s a reason admitting you have a problem is the first step to getting over drug addictions. If you don’t admit it, you’ll just keep on self-destructing in the same way. Piazza suggests telling someone (or the universe) that you’ve reached a deep low due to getting dumped and then making a “moral inventory.” “Answer really hard questions, like why did this go wrong, what did I do wrong, and how can I do better next time,” she says. “And tell yourself, ‘I want to be better in my next relationship. I can only do that by focusing on me and being a stronger person.’”

2. Go on a social media cleanse. One of the biggest revelations Piazza came to from the stories she heard from women was how much social media is being used to drag out and dramatize bad breakups. “You’re seeing their life play out without you. You’re using Facebook to make him jealous and Pinterest and Instagram to stalk your ex’s new girlfriend. You’re seeing your friends’ wonderful date photos and baby pictures,” she says. “Get off Facebook and Twitter. Go cold turkey.” You can use your new free time to be more present when it comes to putting yourself back together.

3. Wear your yoga pants to the gym (not to ice cream eating and Love, Actually marathons on the couch). Now is the time you’ll need endorphins more than ever. “All of the happy chemicals are feeding us when we’re in love, and when that relationship is gone, we crash. Fitness gives us the same feelings of euphoria to push away the bad feelings,” Piazza says. You’ll feel a lot better, and (bonus!) you’ll look better. “After one breakup with a really awful guy, I decided ‘I’m just going to get in awesome shape.’ Sometimes, the best revenge is just being hot.” —Lisa Elaine Held

For more information, check out Love Rehab

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  1. September 12th, 2013 at 12:09 pm

    Fantastic book! Met Jo at an event at Uplift Studios and read the book in days. Funny, endearing and good reminders! Thanks Jo!!

  2. November 4th, 2013 at 7:00 am

    you can also use music as a therapy to get over the depression. One of the smartest way is to design and set a playlist on the mood map of Muzikool.com that starts from sad and traverses along blues, calm, pleasant and to end with happy mood. In the end everyone needs a time to get over from sad to happy emotions. take step-by-step approach. dont disturb your mind and soul with abrupt shock of recommendations. Nothing is instant. Try this tip!

  3. April 23rd, 2014 at 11:18 am

    That is a great book. <3 Another book that really help me get over my breakup was "the breakup handbook for the sensitive soul" by Sophia Hope

    It covers all the little tricks to get over him quick and not get stuck.

  4. December 1st, 2014 at 1:27 am

    I am so pleased to let everyone know and to thank Dr Stanley for doing what he knows how to do best, that is bring back lost lover. My lover and myself has some stress with each other and it lead to our break up, After a while i was missing my lover and i needed Him back but he refuse to pick my call or reply my mails or test message. During my search on how to get him back, i saw a testimony by someone on how Dr. Stanley helped her. So i contacted Dr Stanley with the email address and by his help i was able to get my lover back within 48 hours. If you are having any problem in your marriage or relationship contact Dr Stanley via [email protected] today so that you can also testify of his powers——Latina

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