The astrological reason it feels like all your friends have birthdays in the same month 

I made a new friend the other day, which, as an adult, feels like a giant accomplishment. When our conversation turned to astrology, as they do, I was hardly surprised when she told me she’s a Scorpio. I’m a Pisces, and many of my close friends are Scorpios. So that means each November, I’m to-the-brim busy with birthday celebrations. Maybe for you this doesn’t happen in November, but there’s still a good chance you have one month that sticks out as more stacked with celebratory group dinners than the others. According to astrology, this is not a coincidence, but rather birthday compatibility.

“Astrological compatibility extends beyond romantic relationships,” says Rachel Lang, intuitive astrologer and healer. “We can look at astrology to help decipher compatibility in all types of relationships, including friendships, enemies, bosses, co-workers, frenemies, family members, and friends who feel like family.” She says that it’s very common to have friends born within the same sign (she’s even had clients with friends born on the same day). “Astrological compatibility is complex, but there are a few general guidelines.”

First, understand how to break down the signs in terms of polarity (yin and yang), quality (cardinal, fixed, and mutable), and triplicity or element (fire, earth, air, and water). “The signs with similar triplicities tend to relate well with one another because they have a similar way of focusing and expressing their energy,” she explains.

“You may find that many of your friends’ sun signs are the same as your 11th house—the house of friendship.” —Rachel Lang, intuitive astrologer

Your rising sign also comes into play. “The rising sign or ascendant is the sign on the eastern horizon at the time of your birth, from the vantage point of your birthplace. The ascendant represents the identity you show the world as well as how you interact with the outside world,” Lang says, adding that she sees many friendships where one friend’s sun or moon sign is the same as another friend’s ascendant. “These are points in your chart that can have magnetic attraction to others with similar sun-, moon-, and rising-sign placements. Often, someone whose sun is in your first house can make you feel energized, positive, and upbeat. Someone whose sun sign is the same as your moon sign can make you feel right at home.”

To get more in depth, look at your midpoints. “The midpoint between your sun and Venus, for example, is a degree for relationships,” Lang says. “You might attract friends whose birthdays fall right around that degree in your chart.” And, if you take a deeper look at your natal chart, you may find that many of your friends’ sun signs are the same as your 11th house—the house of friendship. “For example, if you have a Taurus rising, your 11th house would be Pisces. You might notice you have several Pisces friends,” Lang says.

These are just the basic factors to consider when it comes to astrological birthday compatibility, something Lang doesn’t want you to regard was a set of hard and fast rules. “When looking to connect with new friends, look beyond astrology and connect with the person. Then, you can find the astrological relationships as the friendship grows and evolves,” Lang says. In other words, don’t let someone’s zodiac sign turn you off. “If you had a bad experience with a Libra, that doesn’t mean every Libra is going to be the same,” she says, as an example.

“Our charts are so unique, and there are so many different points to consider. Keep an open mind and allow people to surprise you,” Lang says. (Okay, Libras, I’ll give you another chance.)

Now that you’re clear on birthday compatibility, here’s some more astrology intel: Here’s how to set up your day up for success, according to your zodiac sign. Also, because I know you’re curious, is it even worth dating someone if your signs aren’t compatible?