Cher’s early ’90s workout videos make me want to turn back time

The other day I found myself sucked into YouTube black hole. I was trying to explain to a friend with limited knowledge of  The Golden Girls that I often feel like Blanche and Dorothy when they get overdressed in sequined outfits for a workout class. Three hours of mindless YouTube browsing later, I found something I didn’t know I had been looking for all along—Cher’s exercise videos from the ’90s.

Cher is a priceless national treasure unlike any other (save maybe for RBG). Her Twitter is sublime, “Dancing Queen” (an album of ABBA covers) is the reason I made it through 2018, and the 1987 film Moonstruck is perfection. Needless to say, I am a fan. So, when I happened upon this trove (two videos) from the CherFitness series, I nearly passed out.

First released on VHS in 1992 as part of “Body Confidence,” “Hot Dance” runs for a cool 38 minutes (!!!!!!) of equipment-free aerobics. While I haven’t tried this workout myself, people have been swearing by this routine since the grunge era. The real part I’m interested in, however, is Cher’s choice of apparel. For “Hot Dance,” Cher is clad in a black bodysuit with just the right amount of mesh.

Next up, “Step Workout,” which is, well, a step workout. This gem is part of the singer’s first CherFitness video “New Attitude,” which sold 1.5 million copies domestically upon its release in 1991. Throughout the series, Cher’s costume is the real star of the show. So versatile is her wardrobe she could wear it on stage tomorrow. So pure are these workout videos they make me squeal with delight today. Simply put, Cher serves the kind of maximalist energy I need to channel this year.

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