The Kitchenaid Stand Mixer of Sex Toys Is $500 Off, and Sex Educators Say It’s the Exact Investment Your Pleasure Routine Needs

So, for the great news: Now through Cyber Monday, you can get the Cowgirl Premium Sex Machine for $1,000, which is $500 dollars off retail, along with four free attachments, which adds up to as much as an additional $220 in savings. (See, it even has attachments, just like the Kitchenaid.) And if you already have the machine itself, you snag any attachments you want at 40 percent off during the Cowgirl Sex Machine sale event.

Need more convincing? You don't have to twist my arm to get me to wax poetic about my fave sex machine, so here it goes:

Let me tell you about the Cowgirl Premium Sex Machine

“The Cowgirl is about the size of an ottoman, and it contains a giant vibrator inside of it,” says sex educator Alicia Sinclair, CEO of The Cowgirl. To enjoy the mega-vibe, you mount it like you would a mechanical bull and then ride it as you would a human. “The machine gives you the opportunity to have sex, rider-on-top, or cowgirl, style without another person,” Sinclair adds. You could also use a non-penetrative attachment to simulate dry-humping on your own.

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The luxe machine features two different functions: vibrate and swivel. As you might guess, the vibrator function controls which of the six different vibrating intensities you get to experience. And the swivel function—should you choose to use it—controls how quickly the attachment spins inside you. If you enjoy the sensation of having your vaginal or anal walls stroked, consider this a serious win, because very few other sex toys simulate the experience.

Ultimately it's the details that set the Cowgirl apart from other sex machines available on the market. It's the only one that provides thigh padding, making it a more comfortable ride. “The body of the Cowgirl is also made of smooth vegan leather, which feels softer against the body than other materials” says Sinclair. (The vegan leather is also non-porous, which means you can easily wipe it clean with fragrance-free soap and warm water.) Furthermore, “the base of the Cowgirl features silicone bumpers, which stop the machine from sliding on the floor or scratching it,” says Sinclair. Also noteworthy is that it comes with four different adapters, meaning you can get off from literally anywhere in the world.

This sex machine's many attachments (à la a Kitchenaid Stand Mixer) make it wildly versatile

Typically, the Cowgirl comes with just two of its six available silicone attachments. But if you buy through Cyber Monday during the Cowgirl Sex Machine sale, you get four attachments of your choosing for free—which saves you up to an additional $220.

The attachments that totally rocked my world were the two non-penetrative options: The Bareback and The Rawhide. Created for bumping and grinding, the rumbly pressure of these two attachments against my vulva were enough to make me climax...quickly. Like, in under two minutes quickly. If you’re trying to decide between just one of the two options, Sinclair recommends starting with the Bareback, which is smooth. “The Rawhide features textures nubs that add extra sensation that can feel like too much for a first-time rider,” says Sinclair.

Created for bumping and grinding, the rumbly pressure of the two non-penetrative attachments against my vulva were enough to make me climax...quickly. Like, in under two minutes quickly.

There are also a number of penetrative attachments that are safe for vaginal and anal play. I have a non-relaxing pelvic floor, so I generally don’t enjoy penetration with anything thicker than a finger. So unsurprisingly, I didn’t find the Lone Ranger attachment particularly enjoyable—but, if you’re a person who typically enjoys shallow pressure internally, Sinclair suspects you will. “The bulbous shape of the attachment is shaped specifically to stimulate those internal hot spots,” she says. “Many users report that the attachment has helped them squirt for the first time.”

Likewise, with its 4-inch circumference, I found the Bronco Realistic Silicone attachment way too thick. It's designed to replicate a non-circumcised penis (and features a bulbous head and snaking veins to boot), so if you enjoy girthy dildos or fisting, odds are you’ll go bananas for the Bronco. “Because it looks like a realistic body part, the Bronco is especially popular for voyeuristic couples,” says Sinclair. “It allows one partner to watch while the other partner gets penetrated by a realistic-looking cock.”

There’s also an attachment called The BuckWild Double Penetration, which pops a string of anal beads onto the classic The Wild West Attachment. Sinclair says this attachment is the perfect way to explore double penetration without your partner or in front of your partner. For this attachment, in particular, lube is non-negotiable.

Ultimately, the Cowgirl is the best investment for adding some capital-B, capital-T Big Time pleasure to your sex life—be it solo, partnered, or multi-partnered. And given the Cowgirl Sex Machine sale, you can invest knowing you're prioritizing your pleasure needs and bank account. Cheers!

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