Why Selena Gomez wants you to say “no” more

Selena Gomez, actress, singer, and self-described people pleaser, credits her drive to make others happy with leading to her early success as a child star on the Disney Channel (Wizards of Waverly Place FTW). But the talented celeb, who just turned 25, has revealed to InStyle that always saying yes also led her to develop depression and anxiety—for which there was, unfortunately, no magic cure.

But after taking time off for treatment and self-care, Gomez says she’s feeling happier and more confident than ever. Plus, she’s added a new word to her vocabulary that’s very important to maintaining her healthy life balance.

“I’ve learned the power of saying no,” she admits. “I feel empowered when I say it. Just recently, I was by myself with people from my record label, and I looked down the table and said, ‘I respect your opinions, but you’re going to let me make the end call. Just give me a few days to sleep on it.’ And I walked out, and it felt like Anne Hathaway in The Devil Wears Prada, like, ‘Did I just do that?’ It felt good because I wasn’t being disrespectful. Just honest.”

“You have to not be afraid to make mistakes because that’s how you figure it all out.”

And she’s not only speaking her truth behind closed doors in business meetings, either. The celeb’s infusing her social media (Gomez is the most-popular person on Instagram thanks to her 124.3 million followers) with the same type of transparency.

“I’m not afraid of being wrong now,” she reveals. “Because I would rather say, ‘I stand by this.’ You have to not be afraid to make mistakes because that’s how you figure it all out.” And that’s where the real magic happens.

Whether she’s singing, acting, or executive producing the buzzy Netflix show 13 Reasons Why, here’s how Gomez starts her day. And she may seem like the busiest person ever, but she swears by taking time off. Here’s why.