I’m a Nurse and I Hate Exercising—So Here’s What I Do Instead

I don’t have endorphins. At least, that's my working theory because I've never once experienced that legendary post-exercise “high” most people talk about. Endorphins are those feel-good chemicals the body releases during stress or pain to make you feel better. The most I get is sweat in my eyes and the overwhelming desire to never exercise again.

“Why do I hate exercise?” This question haunts me because—life having a sense of humor—I’m a nurse. I tell my patients all the time that exercise is important. That movement is medicine. That just 30 minutes a day can improve their health. I share evidence-based facts about exercising. 

And yet, my gym membership has basically been a monthly donation to a place I rarely visit. When that didn't work, I created a mini home gym, convinced that if I spent money on equipment that was easily accessible, I’d be more inclined to use it. Guess how that turned out? Yep, it just sits there, collecting dust, silently mocking me. (Anyone else in the same boat?)

But I wasn’t always like this. Growing up, I was active: volleyball through middle and high school, team captain of my neighborhood volleyball league, and dance classes three times a week. But somewhere along the way, exercise started feeling like a chore. A miserable, uncomfortable, time-dragging chore. I count down the seconds until I can stop, and the half-second my timer goes off, I’m out.

If you’re nodding along, the usual advice about “finding a sport you enjoy” or “setting a goal” probably feels as useless to you as it does to me. I’ve learned that I’ll never love burpees (does anyone really?) or get excited about lifting weights. But I have figured out one thing that helped me show up at the gym and do the very thing I still hate. Below, I'll share what worked for me, along with insights from experts. 

But first, why do people avoid exercise?

Let's start with the practical barriers. For some, it’s not a matter of hating exercise but more about physical limitations like pain, chronic illness, or mobility issues that make movement difficult. 

For most people, though, the biggest roadblocks tend to be time constraints. With work, family duties, social responsibilities, and a never-ending to-do list, finding 30 minutes for a workout can seem like a tall order. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), only about one in four American adults met the recommended guidelines for both aerobic and muscle-strengthening activities in 2020, with men generally exercising more than women and younger adults being more active than older ones.

Even when time isn’t an issue, psychological barriers can be. “People often feel frustrated with themselves because they do know the benefits of exercise,” Grace Lautman, MS, CN, LMHC, a licensed therapist and eating disorder clinician at Honor Nutrition and Counseling, tells Well+Good. “This can actually lead to shame, and shame doesn't contribute to long-term motivation and behavior change,” she adds.

The gym environment itself can be another psychological hurdle. “One of the major things is intimidation about being inside the actual gym,” certified professional trainer, nutritional coach, and owner of ZGL Fitness, Kiara Zagal, tells Well+Good. That feeling of walking into a room full of seemingly perfect fitness enthusiasts who (you're convinced) are all judging your form. It’s all too easy to quickly get unmotivated and head for the exit, she adds. 

Then there are environmental and resource barriers. Limited access to safe outdoor spaces, pricey gym memberships, and inconvenient facilities can add to the challenge. The same CDC report noted that adults with higher family incomes are more likely to exercise than those with lower incomes.

And if all that wasn't enough, your genes may also have a say. Research suggests that genes partly determine how your body responds to exercise, which can explain why two people following an identical workout program might see vastly different results.¹

All of this makes sense, and maybe it helped answer the “why do I hate exercise?” question for you. But what if, like me, none of these barriers quite explain the resistance to exercise? In my case, I had to dig deeper. Sure, lack of motivation was the surface-level answer, but motivation can be complex. Using brain monitoring, researchers found that our brains have to work harder to choose exercise over being inactive.² It's like we're hardwired to take the path of least resistance—literally.

Understanding this was my wake-up call. I’m the type of person who shows up for others, but without that same level of accountability for myself, exercise always took a backseat. Without someone counting on me to show up, I could easily talk myself out of exercising. Without someone waiting for me at the gym, I could generate an endless list of eye-rolling excuses. On my own, those good intentions wouldn't stand a chance against my brain's preference for well…doing anything but exercise.

What you can do to enjoy physical activity

Making exercising work for you is personal. It will likely take time to figure out what that looks like, and that’s okay. The truth is, you might never enjoy exercising, and that's fine too. The idea isn't to become a fitness enthusiast; it's to find an activity (or activities) you can stick with and that fit into your life. Experts suggest keeping the following in mind as you explore your options:

• Make it your own: Write down the activities you enjoy doing, and if nothing comes to mind immediately, that's okay, Lautman suggests. Sometimes we need to rediscover what feels good. 
• Give yourself grace: Lautman reminds us that life happens and missing workouts is normal. Being flexible and kind to yourself can make you more likely to get back into it when you're ready.
• Reframe your mindset: Zagal suggests shifting from “I have to work out” to “I get to move my body.” Exercise is a form of self-care, and finding ways to make it bearable, such as playing your favorite music, can make all the difference.
• Make it social: If you’re feeling unmotivated, try a friendly competition. Zagal has seen her clients push themselves more when working out in small groups of friends. A little challenge can make exercise feel fun rather than forced.
• Mix it up: You don’t have to stick to traditional workouts. Zagal encourages activities like biking, swimming, rollerskating, or even kayaking. The goal is simply to move in a way that feels good to you.
• Focus on the small wins: Instead of stressing over big fitness goals, celebrate the little victories. That may mean just showing up, trying something new, or making progress, no matter how small. As Zagal puts it, “Success is the sum of small efforts, day in and day out.”

I had to figure out what worked for me. And with accountability being my missing piece, I hired a personal trainer. I know that can be a significant investment, and it's not feasible for everyone. But for me, working with Zagal as my personal trainer has been worth every penny because it helped me finally show up day after day, week after week, month after month. 

That said, if accountability is your struggle, you don't have to spend money. Find a workout buddy or ask a friend to check in on you. As for my cardio? I follow free dance tutorials (usually Salsa) on YouTube. I turn on the video, clear some space, and spend 30 minutes dancing away. I don't think of dancing as exercise. I just enjoy the music and movement, work up a sweat, and get my heart pumping.

So, how much exercise do you *really *need?

It’s probably less than you think. You don’t have to spend hours at the gym or commit to an intense training plan. In fact, the official recommendations are pretty flexible, giving you options based on what works best for your lifestyle.

Here’s the breakdown of recommended physical activity for adults, according to the CDC:

• Option 1: 150 minutes of moderate-intensity aerobic activity per week (think: brisk walking, dancing, or cycling)
• Option 2: 75 minutes of vigorous-intensity aerobic activity per week (like running or a fast-paced high-intensity interval training class)
• Option 3: A mix of moderate- and vigorous-intensity aerobic activity throughout the week

No matter which option you choose, also include muscle-strengthening activities (aka weight lifting) at least twice a week that target all major muscle groups.

That first option (150 minutes a week) could mean 30 minutes, five days a week. And you don't have to do it all at once. Those 30 minutes can be broken into three 10-minute walks throughout your day, for example.If you go beyond these guidelines, say, by walking an extra 30 minutes a day or adding an extra workout each week, you might see even greater improvements in your overall health.

Movement doesn’t have to mean structured workouts, either. Activities like gardening, playing with your kids, taking the stairs, or even cleaning the house count. If the thought of a formal exercise routine makes you want to crawl back into bed, try to be more active in ways that feel good for you.

The bottom line

Missing a workout or falling out of the habit doesn’t mean you’ve failed. It just means you’re human. You don’t have to love exercising either (I still don’t), but find a way to move that fits into your life. Because as you likely already know, moving your body is good for you—even if it's just for a few minutes a day. Give yourself the same kindness you’d give a friend, and keep experimenting until you find what clicks.