Halle Berry is known for being powerful, beautiful, and successful. She’s the first Black woman to win an Academy Award for lead actress, after all. Despite her accomplishments, Berry was once hesitant to speak her mind. The actress and health entrepreneur feared what others would think, deferred to other people’s opinions, and avoided confrontation. But lately, she’s not holding anything back.

“I have no more f*cks to give about telling people how I feel,” Berry tells Well+Good. “That's a really empowered place to be, especially for a woman. We don't always feel that way.”

Ahead, Berry shares how she grew her confidence—and how working with a “menopause coach” has played a major role.

How menopause changed Berry’s outlook on life—and intimacy

Berry, 58, attributes her mindset shift—from avoidant to confident—to embracing getting older, especially concerning her health journey.

Berry learned she was in perimenopause at age 54, when doctors initially misdiagnosed her symptoms as herpes, an experience she describes as “horrific.” She found the resources for women going through menopause so lacking that she took matters into her own hands and founded Respin, a lifestyle platform that offers menopause education, health plans, and community. 

Learning all she can about perimenopause and menopause has given her a support system, a sense of purpose, and the confidence to speak her mind. She also insists on getting her needs met. 

One of the ways that’s manifested is in her sex life. Sex has become something she and her partner savor, with both taking the time to ensure Berry gets the pleasure she knows she’s entitled to. That wasn’t always the case.

“Sometimes sex, at least for me, used to feel like an appetizer,” Berry says. “It would happen, and it would be done. Like, OK, that was cool, moving on. Now, sex is like a five-course meal. It requires that [extended] time at this stage of life, and I have to say, it’s way better. Way better.”

For example, Berry knows that in perimenopause, it can take longer to become lubricated, so more foreplay is a requirement. She also has no qualms about making sure her partner knows that. Communicating her likes and dislikes—or what does and doesn’t work—has made sex a more intimate, fulfilling event.

Getting to know her body in perimenopause has inspired Berry to want the same for other women. She’s now trying to increase support and satisfaction for women while simultaneously shaping her own health journey.

Why Berry started working with a ‘menopause coach’

Berry’s experience working with a trainer for her fitness goals more broadly inspired her to wonder whether she could approach menopause similarly.

“[I thought], wouldn't it be great if I had a coach to help me understand this time of life and hold me accountable and teach me really what I need to do, in order to be my best self during this time?” Berry says. “And I thought probably every woman would benefit from having that.”

What does being her “best self” through menopause mean? Berry approaches menopause with a goal-oriented mindset: she wants to remain physically strong and mentally fit. She says she had children later in life, so being there for them—and hopefully playing with grandkids—keeps her motivated. She also saw how older women in her family “suffered in silence” through menopause.

“They resigned themselves to, oh, I'm getting old, and this is what getting old looks like,” Berry says. “I was determined not to just get ‘old.’ I wanted to stay healthy.”

This past February, Berry’s company expanded to offer Respin Health, a subscription service that offers health plans, expert guidance, and community support for $100-$150 per month. The subscription includes group discussions led by a menopause coach, which Berry herself sometimes participates in. Some discussions are led by Berry’s own menopause coach, Maria Luque, PhD, who has a strong fitness background—Luque was the fitness program manager during her service in the U.S. Air Force, and focused her PhD research on the role of fitness in maintaining quality of life during menopause.

“It's good to have someone who comes from a place of knowledge, understands the data, has a science background, and who can break it down to you in a realistic way,” Berry says. “We can only make the best decisions for ourselves if we have that knowledge and information.”

What Halle Berry is learning from her coach and group

In Berry’s Respin group, women share symptoms and life experiences, all with the expectation of privacy—there’s no going home and talking about the group with partners. Berry sees these discussions as a necessary supplement for the gaps in scientific research regarding menopause (and the lack of women’s health research more generally).

“You'd be surprised how much you learn by just talking with other women,” Berry says. “We figure out how to help ourselves.”

Luque is also available to answer Berry’s one-on-one questions and needs. She’s the accountability Berry needs to stick to her fitness regimen and inspire her when her health plan gets thrown off. Additionally, when Berry wants to understand something—like the benefits of one estrogen treatment over another or a specific nutrition plan—she texts her menopause coach. For example, Berry has learned that a no-carb diet is not optimal for her to build muscle at this age. She was also surprised to learn from Luque that as a Black woman, she was likely to experience symptoms more severely than white women, according to recent research.

“Black and brown women suffer disproportionately,” Berry says. “[Luque] was the first person to tell me that.”

At the same time that Berry is learning to manage her own symptoms, her work in the menopause space has also inspired boldness. She went to Congress to support bills that would allocate more money for menopause research. Berry has become “vocal,” as she puts it, about her own menopause experience. She wants to show that aging can be a time of growth. 

“If we are going to destigmatize menopause and give menopause a rebranding that it can become a wonderful time to look forward to, we women have to start talking,” Berry says. “Women have been so overlooked at this time of our lives. That needs to change.”

Thinking back, Berry wishes her younger self had a window into this perspective. Berry actually recently had an opportunity to reconnect with her younger self. Last year, Berry walked a special runway event in the burgundy Elie Saab gown she famously wore in 2002 when she won an Academy Award. Berry recalled that the 35-year-old who wore that dress to the Oscars felt the weight of career expectations on her shoulders. That version of herself was also afraid of getting older and everything it would mean for her work and life. 

“I wish I’d known at 35 that I had nothing to fear,” Berry tells Well+Good. “That life would just get better and better and better. And so would I.”