There are plenty of Valentine’s Day gift guides available that factor in the longevity of a given relationship—and you should obviously feel free to consult away. But as “relationships” themselves get blurrier and blurrier in definition, the holiday often just gives the gift of stress. If you just started seeing someone new, not only are you left to wonder what kind of gift your new special someone would even like, but also what signals you’re sending with what you choose to give. So, as your no-BS friend from the internet, I have one thing to tell you: there is no need to get a Valentine’s Day gift for someone you’re newly seeing—if it seems lightyears too soon for a DTR conversation, you can save your money for more worthy buys than chocolates and conversation hearts.

However, if you reallllly want to get a gift for a new relationship to show your interest, well, you’re a sweet soul and it’s certainly possible to gift small tokens without making things weird. Keep scrolling to learn how to read the room before you dive into your next date, then shop a few safe gift ideas that say “I like you” without being completely OTT.

Gift ideas for new relationships, at a glance:

Tony’s Chocolonely Variety Pack, $10Yeti Rambler, $30Urbanstems The Risky DM Bouquet, $68Lego Roses, $15Literie Candles “Bodega Bouquets”, $20Vibrant Life Valentine’s Day Dog Toy, $5Bubble Skincare Tell All Juicy Secret Lip Balm, $8

Before you buy a gift, ask yourself…

Are you even seeing this person on Valentine’s Day?

The first step to knowing whether you should gift or not is figuring out if you’re even celebrating the holiday together. And, if it hasn’t been mentioned by now, either bring it up yourself and make a plan, or don’t—but don’t expect for the other person to do so. If you’re not seeing each other, no gift is necessary.

Have plans to see each other on some other Valentine’s Day-adjacent occasion (like the following weekend)? In this case, make sure you communicate about whether or not you’re celebrating the Hallmark holiday together.

And if you definitely do have a Valentine’s Day date plan, then a small token of affection isn’t entirely out of the question. For example, while courting my partner, I gave him a Prince sticker because, well, Vinnie’s Pizzeria was handing them out willy-nilly, and he really loves Prince. Very weirdly, I carried the sticker around in my purse until we “accidentally” crossed paths again.

The point behind this story of my very niche gift is that it’s sweet to offer something small, a touch personal, and not necessarily romantic—with a tiny price ceiling. And if you can also pretend it’s something you didn’t devote much effort or thought to procuring—even better. It’s a way of saying, “I remembered this little thing about you, I’m excited to learn more about you, and if this blows up in my face I’m not taking a gigantic financial hit.”

Lowkey Valentine’s Day gifts for new relationships

Tony's Chocolonely Variety Pack — $10.00

Skip the underwhelming chocolates in a heart-shaped box and get them the good stuff. This variety pack of Tony’s Chocolonely chocolate bars is thoughtful without being palpably lovey-dovey, and the flavors inside (milk and dark bars with additions like hazelnut, caramel, and sea salt) are delicious.

Yeti 10 oz. Rambler — $25.00

If your new boo is a coffee or tea drinker, this insulated Yeti Rambler is a great gift they’ll actually use. Even better, make a coffee run before meeting up, then bring them a warm cup of joe inside their gift. We like this one in Valentine’s Day-appropriate red, but there are over 10 other colors to choose from too, like Tropical Pink, Cosmic Lilac, and Key Lime.

Urbanstems The Risky DM Bouquet — $68.00

Alright, so this isn’t as lowkey as the options above. Still, if flowers feel like the right move (it is called “The Risky DM” after all), this bouquet from Urbanstems is a stunner. It’s stuffed with beautiful pink and red roses and lush greenery and comes in three different sizes.

Lego Roses — $15.00

We know—Lego roses are a niche gift. But if real flowers feel too cliché, buildable flowers might be a fun (and affordable) alternative. You could gift this 120-piece set to someone who has expressed interest in games or puzzles, or build the roses yourself to show just how darn thoughtful you can be. You could even turn it into a date night activity if that feels right—no wrong answers here.

Literie Candles "Bodega Bouquets" — $20.00

Here’s yet another flowers-but-not-flowers gift idea that won’t wilt too soon. Literie Candles “Bodega Bouquets” candle is a blend of natural soy and coconut wax scented with tulips and freesia mimic—you guessed it—a fresh bouquet. With 50 hours of burn time, your Valentine can enjoy it on Feb 14 and beyond.

Vibrant Life Valentine's Day Dog Toy — $5.00

If you’re true Valentine is their fuzzy friend, show your love with this adorable dog toy. The soft plush opens up to a box of polyester “chocolates” and comes complete with a squeaker and crinkle to rile them up.

Bubble Skincare Tell All Juicy Secret Lip Balm — $8.00

Bubble Skincare has popped off in a big way in the last few years, so this trendy lip balm makes a cool-yet-practical gift. The formula uses plant-based oils and butters to nourish lips, and the fruit flavor is truly kissable. Pucker up, Valentine.

How to pick a gift for a new relationship

Opt for something the two of you can share. Wine is always a solid choice, and healthy baked goods certainly work, too. This way you’re elevating your shared experience that might make for a great memory to look back on.

And obviously, if the chocolate-and-flowers cliché feels right to you—go ahead. You’ll most likely get a welcome, happy response from the recipient. Just make sure not to expect anything in return—especially if the two of you never discussed the holiday or your mutual plans for it. If it’s out of generosity and personal desire, give, give, give, you kind, romantic soul, you.

But, the second that quest for the perfect gift spikes your stress, show yourself some love and put the kibosh on that anxiety attack in the making. After all, if you’re with someone who’s the real deal, you’ll have next year to exchange Valentines.